Right now I feel no desire at all to finish Gingerbread Wolves.
I want to be very clear on what I am saying, here. This isn’t an angst-filled self-pitying post that is fishing for comments on how wonderful I am. I’m not at all unhappy. I feel pretty good, in fact.
I just don’t want to write. I wanted to, and I did, and now I feel like I’ve done it. I feel good about the books that I wrote. I feel good about what I’ve accomplished and what I’ve learned while doing it.
I’ve learned that I’m a good writer, but not a successful writer. I can live with that. I won’t go so far as to say that writing was a phase that I was going through–I have always written for my own enjoyment and probably always will–but I do think that trying to be a professional novelist was a phase I was going through.
Right now I am working on a group world-building exercise in a Facebook group that I’m having a lot of fun with, but I don’t particularly want to turn that into a book and go through the whole editing/publishing/promotion circus with that. I’m just having fun.
I am committed to attending a science fiction convention in the fall and running a sales table for a group of indie published books, including mine. I am still going to be doing that.
I have spent several years spending nearly all of the time not taken by my day job on my novels–either working on them or trying to sell them. I’m tired of it. I’d rather do other things with my time.
The thing is, it’s okay to stop doing something that I don’t want to do. It’s my time, I don’t have to do anything other than what I want to do with it.
You’re quite right – you have every right to do with your time what you wish. All the power to you.
But can I still say, NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!? And that I hope you’ll go back to it one day?
Thanks. And maybe I will. I just feel such a sense of relief right now at putting it aside.
Sounds like you’ve made the right decision, if you feel that good about it. People usually wonder “what if?” or have buyer’s remorse, even when the decision is right.
The other great thing about your decision, unlike so many other life decisions, is that it’s completely and easily reversible if you change your mind.
Well, first of all I have to say I’m pretty bummed I won’t get to read Gingerbread Wolves — unless the writing bug hits you at some point in the future, obviously 🙂 But the most important thing is doing what you want to do — and if writing isn’t that special thing for you anymore, then by all means set it aside and focus on something new! Out of curiosity, what do you think your new favorite pastime might be?
It’s been so long since I had fun I don’t even know how many batteries it takes anymore.
Out of even more curiosity – how far was GW from being finished?
About half, I guess–I’m right around 40,000 words.
If you don’t feel like writing, you shouldn’t. It’s hard enough when you WANT to write.
At least you tried it, and you got two whole books out – most people never get that far.
Heh. Three, actually.
If it didn’t feel good to write, I can see abandoning it at this stage.
Just remember to update the electronic media (my previous novel is on 5-1/4 floppy discs!), in the event you decide to come back to it later.
Best of success in whatever comes next.
Do what you want to do and enjoy life…it’s too short not to enjoy it. Write…don’t write, it is and always has been your choice.
Figuring out what I want–rather than what is expected of me–has always been very difficult for me.
It’s actually encouraging to hear someone say they’re tired of all the writing/promoting hard work and are taking a break (however permanent or temporary it turns out to be). It IS hard work and it’s okay to walk away.
I try to be honest here.